The Why of The Lady in the Soccer Suit Referees Soccer

Tiger Woods has been the number one golfer in the world for years (before compounding injuries/personal disasters). Do you know why? Because he has a strong mental state; nothing can bother him on the course. Ever. He never lets the previous hole/swing/chip/putt affect the next hole/swing/chip/putt. He has a heart and head of steel while on the golf course. This has been since his youth. 

While my son was battling through his cancers we met a young doctor who shared with us that he was a good golfer and played against Tiger Woods a lot, especially in their youth and college. This doc never beat Tiger, but was close a few times. Do you know why? He was always thinking of what he should have done on the previous hole/swing/chip/putt. When this doc attempted to make the cut on the pro tour, he came up short. Thankfully, he was a smart guy and pursued medicine instead. He’s a successful physician now.

So, why do I bring up Tiger, this doc, and the reason I referee soccer? Because what I have found through the years and lots of games, it’s all a mental thing. For me, when I hear parents and coaches screaming either at me, or the kids, I did deep into my soul and think of all the kids that wish they could be playing soccer and can’t due to severe medical challenges. Right then and there my thoughts change my attitude and I no longer hear the screams of disappointment or ugliness of the game at hand. There are times (quick and fleeting thoughts) when I think of my son Ryan on the gurney right at the edge of the huge OR doors facing surgery to have half his tongue removed at age 21 due to cancer. Having that quick thought reminds me that what’s in front of me is just a game. 

If and when I need to stop a game to walk over to a coach to quell his absurd measures of dissent, I quietly, even whisper, talk about kids who would love to be on the pitch and can’t be due to those medical challenges already mentioned. This seems to arrest most of the coaches behavior. Those few words snap them out of their crazy banter and the attitude of “win at all costs” by screaming and yelling at anything to get their way. 

To continually work on a strong mental state, like Tiger’s on the golf course, is my superpower on the pitch. It’s why I go back to the game assigned to me each time. 

bSoleille!

Terri

"The Best Daughter" Olivia on the Pitch!